Let me start this blog with a simple request.
Close your eyes, take two deep breaths, and on the third breath, affirm to yourself:
“I love myself”.
Go on – do it.
(Please!)
How did that feel?
Have you ever done that before? Did it feel natural and comfortable – or did it feel strange and rather uncomfortable?
Can you imagine being able to say that to yourself and unashamedly embracing the love, acceptance and honour you feel for yourself?
 |
| Image sourced from www.fallforward.wordpress.com |
Think about the or a person whom you love most in your life. Be them your partner/spouse, friend, parent, sibling, child.
Ask yourself, what is it about them that I love? What is it about them that I most admire? What is it about them that inspires me? What is it about them that makes me feel happy when I am with them?
We are initially drawn to people for many different reasons – e.g. we are born in to our family, we meet a friend on the first day of kinder, we feel physically and emotionally attracted to our partner/spouse the moment we 'lay eyes' on them... Over time, the initial reasons or ‘pullings’ that drew us together can become less evident and we simply accept our closeness with those we love as ‘fact’ – it is just something that is, for no particular reason – "I just love him/her/them..."
You know the person/people well enough to know that they aren’t “perfect,” and yet there is a deep level of peace and acceptance as who they are in their entirety – They are who they are, and you love them. It’s as simple as that.
I wonder, if you were to go to that person/people and ask them those same questions (about yourself) how they might answer?
What is it about YOU that they love? What is it about YOU that they most admire? What is it about YOU that inspires them? What is it about YOU that makes them feel happy when they are with you?
How would it make you feel to hear them talk about you in that way? Would you feel free to accept and embrace their kind words?
What is your immediate (subconscious) reaction when someone you love pays you a compliment? Do you hear what they have said and allow yourself to enjoy their love/kindness by saying, “Thanks, that’s very kind of you.” Or is your tendency to immediately fend off their compliment by offering any and all excuses/reasons as to why you aren't deserving of their support/acceptance by saying, “Oh no – not me… No I’m no good at it…” OR “Oh not really, you should see how someone else does it... they're much better than me...” OR “No idea how I managed to get that right…”
Several people I have connected with this week have reminded me of how easy it is to show compassion, love, support and priority to anyone and everyone but oneself, and how difficult some can find it to be kind to oneself.
The practice of self-compassion, self-kindness, and self-love have become an essential part of my being and I urge each and every one of you to find the goodness and worth in you, beautiful you.
Having compassion for oneself is not being selfish. Recognising and prioritising one’s needs is not being egotistic.
Self-care is a necessity, not an indulgence.
Looking after ourselves enables us to stress less, be more present to our daily life, feel happier, and we are more likely to look after not only our mental state, but our emotional, spiritual and physical state.
To be self-caring and compassionate means that we extend the love and kindness we would feel for another were they in the same situation as ourself.
What I am suggesting, is that whenever you are feeling low energetically (e.g. sad, hurt, frightened, frustrated, guilty, imperfect, inferior, nervous…), practice being kind to yourself. Be generous with your gentleness. Say to yourself whatever it is you would say to your true/closest ‘love’ were they feeling the same way.
It is important to acknowledge and connect with our pain with honesty, rawness, feeling and tenderness. Feeling vulnerable is part of the human experience. When we have compassion for ourselves, we recognize our suffering and remind ourselves of what it is that drives, inspires and lifts us.
When I am feeling 'low', I choose to nourish myself with quiet alone times. I energise myself with good quality, wholesome foods I have lovingly prepared for myself, and I honour myself with loving, affirming ‘self-talk'.
How do you tend to treat yourself when you are feeling low?
Do you take the same 'time-out' you would support your friend/lover/family member to take or do you continue to rush about and prioritise others and just hope that you will start to feel better sometime soon?
Allow me to end this blog with another simple request.
At some point this evening, make 3-5 minutes of “you-time” where you will not be disturbed and stand yourself in front of a mirror.
Close your eyes, take two deep breaths, and on the third breath, open your eyes and affirm to yourself, “I love myself”.
Then do it again. And again.
Continue to say it to yourself and notice how you feel – physically, emotionally and mentally.
The more you practice saying it, the more natural it will start to feel. Stop when you feel ready (after a couple of minutes), and then continue about your evening.
Notice how you feel afterwards. Does the self-love start to sit a bit more comfortably?
The more we practice the art of self-compassion and self-love, the more natural it will feel. I suggest you practice this declaration/affirmation throughout the week and let me know how you go – You are likely to notice increased energy and peace.
The more love we have for ourselves, the more love we have to give to others.
Think about this. Allow it to resonate deep within you. Play with it – and enjoy!
No comments:
Post a Comment